This is a video from slides I used many years ago to turn a popular love song for others into a love song from Jesus.
What If? 09-15-2025
During 40 years of pastoral counseling and hospice chaplaincy I’ve walked with many youth and adults who were asking, “What if?” Most questions of “What if” involve life & death — what if the.… gun, car, disease, decision, protection, other person…. Eventually an answer to the question lies in discovering there is none. After all, “control is an illusion fueled by emotion.”
Last night I returned from my 1st & 50th high school reunion in Louisville. In 7th grade I entered the competitive college-prep arena. Our all-boys school merged with an all-girls school my sophomore year which proved to be excellent timing. We mourned 4 of the 66 in my class who had died.
I was filled with all the curiosity, emotions, baggage, and appreciation I anticipated. I was surprised that my sense of being overlooked in high school was dispelled by warm welcomes, fond memories, and new discoveries. I was grateful my quest of “do no harm” led to not needing to dodge anyone.
I found myself asking, “What if?” What if I’d dated or kept dating someone? What if I’d come home to my father’s business? What if I didn’t focus on my present and kept in touch with my past? What if I lived the life others lived?
Driving home we listened to Sirius 7 — Casey Kasem’s “American Top 40” from 9/72 (the month the ladies arrived). I honored my wife with Garth Brook’s 1990 song, “Unanswered Prayers.” It occurred to me that “What Is!” is more important than “What if?” I can fantasize, bemoan, envy, all the ifs. I can live into, relish, be grateful for, and respond to my one life that is. Relishing the full abundant loving life that is mine to live unlocks my gratitude and service.
When have you asked “What if?” What were the circumstances? When have you been present to and aware of “What is!”? How has appreciating “what is” affected your outlook on life?
Building Bigger Barns 04072025
On his walk to Jerusalem to celebrate the last Passover of his life, the rabbi Jesus told this story found in Luke chapter 12.
Someone from the crowd said to Jesus, “Teacher, tell my brother to divide the inheritance with me.” Jesus said to him, “Man, who appointed me as judge or referee between you and your brother?” Then Jesus said to them, “Watch out! Guard yourself against all kinds of greed. After all, one’s life isn’t determined by one’s possessions, even when someone is very wealthy.”
As a pastor and hospice chaplain, I’m grateful for the example of Jesus not to get embroiled in a family inheritance battle. No one comes out unscathed. “Life is not determined by one’s possessions” is often ignored by religious conmen (except for relieving you of the burden of your possessions). THEN Jesus tells a parable. A parable is a story that never happened but is always true. You might notice how many times “I”, “my”, and “self” occur after the land (not the man) produced a bountiful crop.
“A certain rich man’s land produced a bountiful crop. He said to himself, What will I do? I have no place to store my harvest! Then he thought, Here’s what I’ll do. I’ll tear down my barns and build bigger ones. That’s where I’ll store all my grain and goods. I’ll say to myself, You have stored up plenty of goods, enough for several years. Take it easy! Eat, drink, and enjoy yourself. But God said to him, ‘Fool, tonight you will die. Now who will get the things you have prepared for yourself?”
What is the lasting truth from this ancient story? Where is the joy of love, inclusion, peace, and community for a fool who dies alone — save for his selfish possessions? If life isn’t about possessions what might life be about?
What’d I Miss? 02052025
Washington Irving’s character “Rip Van Winkle” slept through 20 years and returned to a changed village. I’ve only been out of it for 2 weeks. We’ve been in France (the French side of the Caribbean island of Saint Martin) since Jan. 19. That was the day before the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr’s birthday (a day of equality, mercy, inclusion, and service to others) and the day of beginning of the end (grabbing all the money and power you can by those lusting for more).
The historian Dom Crossan taught me this truth: “The history of civilization reveals that you can have a Republic and you can have an Empire; but you can’t have both for long.”
In Lin Manuel Miranda’s musical “Hamilton” the second act opens with the beginning of the American Republic and Thomas Jefferson returning from France. Red-faced James Madison greets his return with these words: “Thomas, we are engaged in a battle for our nation’s very soul. Can you get us out of the mess we’re in? Hamilton’s new financial plan is nothing less than government control. I’ve been fighting for the South alone. Where have you been?”
Thus begins Jefferson’s song “What’d I Miss?”…. “What’d I miss? I’ve come home to this! Headfirst into a political abyss! What’d I Miss?”
Being unplugged for two weeks, I too wonder what’d I miss? You can speak it, write it, rap it, or think it but I’m curious what your answer would be to my question: “What’d I miss?”
Questioning Writings 013125
On my 21st birthday, during my cousin’s funeral, I learned it was good to disagree with those who seek to represent God. As we sang the comforting hymn “our God our help in ages past, our hope for years to come…” my aunt said, “I hate that idea; it’s not true for me or helpful at all.”
The battle-line was “time like an ever-rolling stream bears every child away; they fly forgotten as a dream dies at the opening day.” Before the closing “Amen” my aunt leaned over to say, “My daughter is not and never will be forgotten!!!!” Grieving mothers, like all God’s creatures, need to speak their truth in love.
Soon, in addition to evaluating poems, God gave me the freedom to evaluate human ideas expressed in Biblical passages. Among the many views over the millennia of expressions I would question what was true in my experience, what was helpful and life-giving, what inspired beauty, compassion, equality, love, and what best expressed God’s vision for an abundant life for this planet. Sometimes a Biblical writer’s expression of God was “not true for me or helpful at all” but most of their insights transformed my life.
As Rainer Rilke taught me: “Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a foreign tongue. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.” Living the questions has been helpful and true for me.
What questions do you live into without simple answers? How have you found God encouraging you to seek what is true and helpful from the writings of others? How do tyrants who don’t allow questions without retribution seem anti-Christlike to you?
A Thankful Life November 26, 2024
In 1955, he had a wife, son 6, daughter 5 and a blossoming business career in his insurance agency. He was on a second honeymoon at Sea Island, Georgia, enjoying the sun, sand, and sustenance. One morning in the shower his legs gave out from under him; he couldn’t stand up. A doctor told him he had polio and needed to get home right away. Commercial airlines were out of the question, but a private plane pilot was willing to take the risk of the infectious disease. During the flight, the man considered jumping out the door of the plane in order to skip all the pain and uncertainty that accompanied his dreaded disease.
Polio affects different people in very different ways. The man learned his polio was not fatal, but it was crippling; there was a good chance he would never walk again. The man didn’t give up. Day after day he went through the hard work of therapy as he tried to make his polio-ravaged muscles work. After almost a year, the man was able to walk home. Ten months after therapy, he and his wife had a third child who was 8 and 7 years younger than his siblings; I was that child.
I never knew my father before he had polio; I believe he lived a thankful life before polio, but I certainly know he did afterwards. My father taught me about being thankful and appreciative for all that God gives us in this world. He taught me that life itself is a gift, a gift to be treasured, appreciated, and shared with others — a gift to be responded to by serving the one who gave you your life, and who gives you your salvation from violence, fear, and death. My father’s motto was from Athens, Greece: “Leave your city better than you found it.” Through his civic leadership and charitable work, he did just that. I don’t know how much my father’s illness affected his outlook but I do know the joy he had in living his life fully until he was 92.
Who inspired you to live a thankful life? Where do you find the joy in loving, giving, and being thankful? How do you respond to the challenges and gifts you’ve been given by living your life fully?
Bookends 110824
One bookend of my ministry is Frederick Buechner. In seminary I read Peculiar Treasures: A Biblical Who’s Who. After retirement, when I was discerning becoming a writer I was led to “Writing for your Life” with Brian Allain. This online community still brings together incredible spiritual writers and publishers as a community of help to authors who often feel isolated. During Covid, a week-long, in-person conference I wouldn’t afford, was available on Zoom; I took 4.
Brian had an MBA from Wharton school of business. He worked in technology and high tech. He was contacted by Frederick Buechner’s family to make his writings and insights available online. His teamwork in technology introduced him to this spiritual writer. In retirement, he used his teamwork and business skills to help other spiritual writers. The reason you can receive a daily quote from frederickbuechner.com is because of Brian’s work. He brought spiritual writers together to write essays in “How To Heal Our Divides” and the sequel.
My first Buechner quote from that first book I read continues to get quoted most holy weeks:
Pilate told the people that they could choose to spare the life of either a murderer named Barabbas or Jesus of Nazareth, and they chose Barabbas. Given the same choice, Jesus, of course, would have chosen to spare Barabbas too.
To understand the reason in each case would be to understand much of what the New Testament means by saying that Jesus is the Savior, and much of what it means too by saying that, by and large, people are in bad need of being saved. (Mark 15:6-15) ~originally published in “Peculiar Treasures” and later in “Beyond Words”.
Who are the spiritual writers in your life? Who has inspired you to discover and do “what is yours to do”? What is one bookend on your life to this point in your journey?
Questions 102524
I appreciate those who contact me personally for putting into words what they fear retribution for saying. I don’t need support to do what’s morally right, but I appreciate it. Since I began writing reflections for the church I served during the Covid shutdown, I’ve shared my experience and asked questions to connect to yours. I have wisdom in a few things, but I’m only an expert in my experience; we’re all experts in our experiences.
One question asked from yesterday, was “Why is Hebrew and Greek important?” The First Testament (“covenant”) of the Bible was written in Hebrew – the language of the Jews. The 2nd Testament was written in Alexander the Great’s Greek. Jesus spoke Aramaic. Every translation changes the original in some ways so understanding translations helps interpret the meaning. See how people radically change what Trump says with their “translations” — all in English.
I was also asked how I was taught to define fascism. The best answer came this week from Monday travels with Rick Steves we’ve enjoyed since the pandemic. Listen for yourself echoes of fascism today. Here’s Mondays show.
How do you translate and interpret Ephesians 4? — So Christ himself gave the church apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors and teachers, to equip people for works of love and service…. Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.
Delusions 101424
During my seminary class in pastoral care the professor said, “My first assignment in Clinical Pastoral Education at a mental hospital was to talk the patients out of their delusions. All of us failed that assignment; some of us took longer to give up. If you’re under the delusion that a rational argument will sway a delusional person, then I can give you the same assignment.” I’m reflecting on that lesson on this 17th anniversary of my being committed to Mid-MO mental hospital after my first (and only) Bi-Polar One manic psychotic break with reality.
On this day in 2007, when I called my sister to inform her that I was in charge of resetting the economy like the Jubilee Year that Jesus proclaimed, fifty years of being my sister and thirty years of being a psychologist came together in tears. After I hung up, she called my wife to inform her I was manic and nothing could talk me down. She told her to shelter our son safely in another home, to have someone with me at all times so I didn’t disappear, and to pray that I would do something bad enough to get committed for treatment, but not bad enough that I ruined the rest of my life. That was a very fine line to walk, but that prayer was answered fully.
Medication treated my delusions, counseling helped me deal with stressful antagonists, spiritual direction taught me practices for grieving, and nine months of disability let me rest to return to ministry in my old church as a new pastor. I can only imagine the damage I might have done if I had enablers who gave me power as they tried to say my delusions were real. I am glad for those who challenged my lies, and for our rule of law that allowed a judge who was and is my friend to sign my committal papers to get me the help I needed to be who I am today.
What is your experience with a person struggling with mental illness and seeking mental health? Describe a time you struggled to rationally talk another person out of their delusions? Who has helped you grow into a better person?
Patrol Boy 101124
Last night we started watching the 2012 documentary on Ethel Kennedy. This afternoon we learned she just died at the age of 96. Eerie. While giving thanks for my heroes working for justice and racial equality during my childhood, I also thought of being a patrol boy; weird; here’s why.
A week after being chosen to be a patrol boy, during my training in June, I heard Sen. Kennedy had been shot; the news wouldn’t sink in for several years. When I started my year serving as a patrol boy, I was given the responsibility of helping Chenoweth Elementary kids safely cross Brownsboro Road — the four-lane state Highway 42 in Louisville’s east end.
I liked the power and prestige that went with being chosen to be a patrol boy. When I felt like it, I could push the cross button to change the light and stop all the traffic on Hwy 42. I would tell the kids when to cross. I loved the sense of control over others I had. I loved the look of my patrol boy outfit with a white belt across my waist and shoulder and a silver badge with AAA on it. (I thought it was something super cool like A plus plus.)
Soon enough I learned that being chosen is not easy. The few sunny fall days became the many rain, sleet, snow days. I had to get there early, stay late, and be responsible. But at least I wasn’t alone; I always had the other patrol boy assigned to that crossing by my side.
People of faith often talk about being chosen for their spiritual journey. I now know that being chosen isn’t easy. It isn’t about the control, the power, the badge, or the certificate in the end. We are chosen to serve — to do our part each day to make the crossings of others safer and better with our presence. We are chosen not because we are better, but to be better.
When have you experienced the honor of being chosen before learning how much responsibility you would have? How have you helped others cross dangerous paths on their journeys? What rewards do you receive in loving and serving others with empathy and compassion?