Ich und Du… I and Thou 02252025

Within the safe walls of seminary I read Martin Buber’s book “I-Thou”. I don’t recall all the nuances but the basic idea that called me into a new life can be shared briefly. We treat other people as an I-IT or an I-THOU. I tried to image all the preventable suffering between his writing the book in German in 1923 and the translation I had from 1970.

My attitude towards an IT is transactional —how I can experience, use, manipulate, control…. another as an IT. When I dehumanize, categorize, judge, hate, exploit, define another, I am treating someone as an IT. Joseph Stalin was born a year after Buber’s book. His quote in the Washington Post January 20, 1947 illustrates I-IT: “If only one man dies of hunger, that is a tragedy. If millions die, that’s only statistics.”

An I-THOU is a relationship that does not objectify another but lives in a fully present relationship. When I treat others as a THOU not an it, they in turn are drawn in relationship to me. God always relates to us as I-THOU and invites into relationship. We can turn our relationship with God into an I-IT when we talk about God instead of talking to God.

Writing clergy in his “Letter from a Birmingham Jail” April 16, 1963 the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. writes: “Segregation, to use the terminology of the Jewish philosopher Martin Buber, substitutes an “I it” relationship for an “I thou” relationship and ends up relegating persons to the status of things. Hence segregation is not only politically, economically and sociologically unsound, it is morally wrong and sinful.”

What I-IT treatments of people do you see today that are not only politically, economically and sociologically unsound, but morally wrong and sinful? When have you experienced a profound I-THOU relationship with God, a human being or nature? How does technology impact how you relate to others?

Martin Niemöller 02182025

The Stuttgart declaration of guilt was signed by leaders of the Protestant Church in Germany in October 1945. It confesses in part: “That which we often testified to in our communities, we express now in the name of the whole church: We did fight for long years in the name of Jesus Christ against the mentality that found its awful expression in the National Socialist regime of violence; but we accuse ourselves for not standing to our beliefs more courageously, for not praying more faithfully, for not believing more joyously, and for not loving more ardently.” It’s not too late to admit you’re mistakes.

An instigator and signer of that declaration was Martin Niemöller who had initially supported Adolph Hitler as an anti-semite. When Hitler ordered protestant churches to preach Nazi doctrine, Martin became one of the founders of the Confessing Church that said we will follow Jesus’ rather than the state. He spent 8 years in concentration camps where his views changed. When he barely survived, he became a famous speaker for protecting human rights. It’s not too late to change your mind.

As a teenager one of the posters on my bedroom was this quote from Martin Niemöller: “First they came for the socialists, and I did not speak out – because I was not a socialist. Then they came for the trade unionists, and I did not speak out – because I was not a trade unionist. Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out – because I was not a Jew. Then they came for me – and there was no one left to speak for me.” Sometimes it’s too late.

You can’t see the poster on my bedroom wall anymore, but you’ll find the quote at the Holocaust Museum in Washington, DC. 

What is yours to do?

What’d I Miss? 02052025

Washington Irving’s character “Rip Van Winkle” slept through 20 years and returned to a changed village. I’ve only been out of it for 2 weeks. We’ve been in France (the French side of the Caribbean island of Saint Martin) since Jan. 19. That was the day before the Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr’s birthday (a day of equality, mercy, inclusion, and service to others) and the day of beginning of the end (grabbing all the money and power you can by those lusting for more). 

The historian Dom Crossan taught me this truth: “The history of civilization reveals that you can have a Republic and you can have an Empire; but you can’t have both for long.”

In Lin Manuel Miranda’s musical “Hamilton” the second act opens with the beginning of the American Republic and Thomas Jefferson returning from France. Red-faced James Madison greets his return with these words: “Thomas, we are engaged in a battle for our nation’s very soul. Can you get us out of the mess we’re in? Hamilton’s new financial plan is nothing less than government control. I’ve been fighting for the South alone. Where have you been?”

Thus begins Jefferson’s song “What’d I Miss?”…. “What’d I miss? I’ve come home to this! Headfirst into a political abyss! What’d I Miss?” 

Being unplugged for two weeks, I too wonder what’d I miss? You can speak it, write it, rap it, or think it but I’m curious what your answer would be to my question: “What’d I miss?”

Questioning Writings 013125

On my 21st birthday, during my cousin’s funeral, I learned it was good to disagree with those who seek to represent God. As we sang the comforting hymn “our God our help in ages past, our hope for years to come…” my aunt said, “I hate that idea; it’s not true for me or helpful at all.”

The battle-line was “time like an ever-rolling stream bears every child away; they fly forgotten as a dream dies at the opening day.” Before the closing “Amen” my aunt leaned over to say, “My daughter is not and never will be forgotten!!!!” Grieving mothers, like all God’s creatures, need to speak their truth in love.

Soon, in addition to evaluating poems, God gave me the freedom to evaluate human ideas expressed in Biblical passages. Among the many views over the millennia of expressions I would question what was true in my experience, what was helpful and life-giving, what inspired beauty, compassion, equality, love, and what best expressed God’s vision for an abundant life for this planet. Sometimes a Biblical writer’s expression of God was “not true for me or helpful at all” but most of their insights transformed my life.

As Rainer Rilke taught me: “Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a foreign tongue. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.” Living the questions has been helpful and true for me.

What questions do you live into without simple answers? How have you found God encouraging you to seek what is true and helpful from the writings of others? How do tyrants who don’t allow questions without retribution seem anti-Christlike to you?

Omnipotence 012525

I returned home from college for my 21st birthday. Our family spent the day burying my cousin who was senselessly killed at 24 when a speeding car ran a stop sign. That was the day I began to let go of God being omnipotent (omni=all, complete, total + potent=power, influence, effect).

How could an all-powerful and all-loving God allow my cousin to be killed? She was a devoted Christian on her way to teach aphasia stroke patients how to speak again; she had a lot to live for and a lot of empathy, compassion, joy, and love to share.

If God is an uncaring, greedy, manipulative, vindictive, authoritative tyrant then we need no further explanations. But if God is love, compassion, seeking beauty, joy and abundance for the whole creation, then something is wrong.  I knew in the depths of my being that God was loving; maybe I miscalculated the all-powerful part. It was what I’d been told, but was it true? Did it fit the God of the Bible and experience?

The funeral home death march was when I first heard the 20 horrible things people say about God — rehearsed lines in funeral lines (trying to protect God’s reputation or be helpful to you, but failing at both). “God wanted her with him” (so did we); “she’s in a better place” (being here with us was good enough); “God only takes the best” (wish she’d been a little worse); “God has a plan” (well this plan sucks); “God is teaching you a lesson” (the lesson will never be worth the cost because the teacher needs a better lesson plan)……. 

Nobody was being cruel — just thoughtless — mindlessly repeating what they’d heard even when it hadn’t helped them. Maybe there’s a better way; maybe we can find it together. One teaser from my friends I share with you — what if we replace omnipotence with amipotence — the power of love (Huey Lewis more than Celine Dion). Come and see.

What life experiences impacted your views about God? What answers do you seek for bad things happening to good people and good things happening to bad people? Where is one example of real love ever being controlling?

Wo Bist Du?  Dec. 14, 2024

Last Sunday we worshipped in the New Cathedral — new being 1860 — in Linz, Austria. It’s the largest cathedral in Austria but it’s spire was forced 6 meters below the spire of St. Stephen’s in Vienna. The Habsburg family had the empire’s home field advantage after all.

The church is named “Mariä-Empfängnis-Dom” which translates “the church of the Immaculate Conception of Mary”. The English translation didn’t help my incomprehension of immaculate conceptions. That Sunday in the Roman Catholic Church calendar just happened to be Immaculate Conception Day – Dec. 8. If I was supposed to be enlightened by this confluence, it was lost in translation; I could barely hear the German echoing off the high stone walls.

I was moved by the organ, the choir, the “smells and bells”. We were warmly welcomed in a cold room where we watched our breath. During the scripture I tried to sense what I was hearing. The first clue was garten (garden), then der mensch (the man), but I knew it was Genesis 3, when I heard “Wo bist du?” (God asking the man “Where are you?”). 

German has a proper form of you — sie — for strangers, formality, etc. The intimate, friendly, familial form of you is du — where are you my friend is what God asks. While I didn’t understand a lot that day, I heard the first question in the Bible — God asking human beings “Where are you?” 

The second most important question happens a few verses later. Cain has just murdered his brother Abel, and God asks him, “Where is your brother?” Where are you in relation to God and where are you in relation to all your brothers and sisters? Jesus completes these two initial questions by teaching the whole Bible is summed up with the command to love God with all that you are, and to love your neighbor as yourself.

What are some teachings of some churches you can’t translate or comprehend? When you are hiding, how do you sense God asking, “Where are you my beloved?” When you are estranged, what steps do you take to seek reconciliation with your brother/sister/neighbor/human?

A Thankful Life  November 26, 2024

In 1955, he had a wife, son 6, daughter 5 and a blossoming business career in his insurance agency. He was on a second honeymoon at Sea Island, Georgia, enjoying the sun, sand, and sustenance. One morning in the shower his legs gave out from under him; he couldn’t stand up. A doctor told him he had polio and needed to get home right away. Commercial airlines were out of the question, but a private plane pilot was willing to take the risk of the infectious disease. During the flight, the man considered jumping out the door of the plane in order to skip all the pain and uncertainty that accompanied his dreaded disease.

Polio affects different people in very different ways. The man learned his polio was not fatal, but it was crippling; there was a good chance he would never walk again. The man didn’t give up. Day after day he went through the hard work of therapy as he tried to make his polio-ravaged muscles work. After almost a year, the man was able to walk home. Ten months after therapy, he and his wife had a third child who was 8 and 7 years younger than his siblings; I was that child.

I never knew my father before he had polio; I believe he lived a thankful life before polio, but I certainly know he did afterwards. My father taught me about being thankful and appreciative for all that God gives us in this world. He taught me that life itself is a gift, a gift to be treasured, appreciated, and shared with others — a gift to be responded to by serving the one who gave you your life, and who gives you your salvation from violence, fear, and death. My father’s motto was from Athens, Greece: “Leave your city better than you found it.” Through his civic leadership and charitable work, he did just that. I don’t know how much my father’s illness affected his outlook but I do know the joy he had in living his life fully until he was 92.

Who inspired you to live a thankful life? Where do you find the joy in loving, giving, and being thankful? How do you respond to the challenges and gifts you’ve been given by living your life fully?

Georgia Baptist 11/13/24

In 1980 my 23rd summer was spent experiencing a semester of Clinical Pastoral Education as a student chaplain. In days of yore when hospitals were not-for-profit, many were founded by religious communities. You didn’t have to be some flavor of baptist to be a patient at Georgia Baptist Hospital in Atlanta. I could stay Presbyterian and work there, too .

I encountered people of many faiths, personalities, and backgrounds when I entered a hospital room as their chaplain. My calling was to walk their path with them – not force them onto my path. It took weeks for me to grow from “I’m just one of the student chaplains here” to “I’m your chaplain.”

It was not easy for me to enter a stranger’s room uninvited. As someone else said, “I pray every time I visit a patient — sometimes out loud.” My worst fears were realized when I walked into one man’s room saying, “Good morning, my name is Wally and I’m your chaplain.” He bellowed from his bed, “Who let you in here? I don’t want a chaplain! I’m an atheist. Get lost.”  

I was so stunned I couldn’t move. Something happened that has only happened a few times in my life. My mouth started moving, but I wasn’t doing the talking. The words that came out of my mouth would never come from me alone. While my body was shaking my mouth asked, “What kind of God do you not believe in?”

The man began to tell me about the vindictive, judgmental, angry God he didn’t believe in. I said, “Wow…. I don’t believe in that God either.” After a few more exchanges, he invited me to sit down as he told me about his life and his father. We were united by a shared un-belief.

What kind of God do you not believe in?  What questions are you asking? How have you experienced a spirit speaking through you in ways you didn’t anticipate or control?

Bookends 110824

One bookend of my ministry is Frederick Buechner. In seminary I read Peculiar Treasures: A Biblical Who’s Who. After retirement, when I was discerning becoming a writer I was led to “Writing for your Life” with Brian Allain. This online community still brings together incredible spiritual writers and publishers as a community of help to authors who often feel isolated. During Covid, a week-long, in-person conference I wouldn’t afford, was available on Zoom; I took 4.

Brian had an MBA from Wharton school of business. He worked in technology and high tech. He was contacted by Frederick Buechner’s family to make his writings and insights available online. His teamwork in technology introduced him to this spiritual writer. In retirement, he used his teamwork and business skills to help other spiritual writers. The reason you can receive a daily quote from frederickbuechner.com is because of Brian’s work. He brought spiritual writers together to write essays in “How To Heal Our Divides” and the sequel. 

My first Buechner quote from that first book I read continues to get quoted most holy weeks:

Pilate told the people that they could choose to spare the life of either a murderer named Barabbas or Jesus of Nazareth, and they chose Barabbas. Given the same choice, Jesus, of course, would have chosen to spare Barabbas too.

To understand the reason in each case would be to understand much of what the New Testament means by saying that Jesus is the Savior, and much of what it means too by saying that, by and large, people are in bad need of being saved. (Mark 15:6-15) ~originally published in “Peculiar Treasures” and later in “Beyond Words”.

Who are the spiritual writers in your life? Who has inspired you to discover and do “what is yours to do”? What is one bookend on your life to this point in your journey?

Shibboleth  103124

As a break from watching candidates’ speeches and interviews, we’ve been watching “West Wing” on HBO. That sentence may raise anxiety about my mental meds still working — they are. The season 2, Nov 22, 2000 Thanksgiving episode called “Shibboleth” is my favorite. I laugh at CJ’s turkeys; I tear up when President Bartlet entrusts Charlie with his carving knives passed from father to son; I am inspired by an obscure Biblical story from a catholic president’s character — the character displayed by the character portrayed.

A boatload of Chinese evangelical Christians arrive in California seeking asylum for being persecuted for their faith. How does anyone determine if they are sincere in their life-threatened beliefs or just saying pre-scripted words to get into this country? Bartlet cites the metaphor of “shibboleth”. In Judges 12:6 it was not just knowing the word meant “corn” or “river”. It was how you pronounced the word tested trust. The dialect difference between saying Shibboleth instead of Sibboleth let you know whose side you were on. 

There’s a man who bragged on tape he grabbed women’s genitals whether they like it or not because he’s the star…. who owes five million dollars to E. Jean Carol because an impartial jury believed legal evidence he sexually assaulted and defamed her whether she liked it or not….  who tried to use lies, intimidation, and violence to steal an election whether the majority of  voters liked it or not. Last night I heard that man promise: “I’ll protect women whether they like it or not.” That was the wrong speech — autonomous women needing autocratic patriarchal protection to make decisions for their lives. Maybe Sibboleth is a bunch of corn that floats down a river of shi…..bboleth.

Nine days ago, as a pastor and hospice chaplain I was interested in hearing the Vice-President’s answer to the CNN town hall questions on grief and her faith. “I pray every day; sometimes twice a day. I was raised in church to believe in a loving God, to believe that your faith is a verb — how you live your life, how you can serve in a way that is uplifting other people, caring for other people — that guides a lot of how I think about my work and what is important.” 

How do I know if that’s genuine or a script used to get in? Soon she said she called her pastor Amos Brown, the Sunday the president announced he would no longer seek the nomination. She said, “I just called him. I needed that spiritual kind of connection. I needed advice. I needed a prayer. There’s a part of the scripture that talks about Esther, ‘such a time as this,’ and that’s what we talked about. And it was very comforting for me.” Citing the Bible’s book of Esther and knowing Mordecai said to her, “Who knows if you’ve been placed here for such a time as this?” — that was true shibboleth for me.

What is your shibboleth? How do you determine who is genuine and trustworthy in your life? How do you measure yours and other’s words and actions?